Autumn in the Valley

 

 Here in the valley our autumn days are often cold and dreary, taxing the strength we will need to get us through the winter ahead. When the sunshine peeks out for even a moment I try to take the time to soak up its rays, steeling myself for the inevitable bluster that is bound to follow. By now the gardens stand nearly bare, only the resilient varieties remain, as if in rebellion of the chilly gusts. The urge to escape the foreboding storm is stronger than the restless spring fever I usually experience. It seems that my default strengths and emotions have been altered in my sojourn here. Still one would find cause to wonder if I remained unadapted to my environment. Each new challenge has etched the way I relate to those events that unfold day by day. Some of the marks it has left are deep and painful, but necessary to achieve greater heights of knowledge and independence. I should know by now that when I become satisfied with things as they are, that I have become too attached and dependent on something. Circumstances change, I become unsettled but it produces growth when I am forced out of my comfort zone. Time and time again the lessons seem to have a common theme: I am the only answer I have to my problems. "Because when push comes to shove, I taste what I'm made of. I might bend until I break, because that is all I can take. On my knees I look up, decide I've had enough. I get mad. I get strong. I wipe my hands, shake it off then I stand." Rascal Flatts.

Operation rescue.

Heroism isn't as awesome as its cracked up to be. Way overrated. Fishing wet, stinky, saturated, filthy, angry kitties out of the gutter and manure pit in the pitch dark is not my idea of a pleasant evening. I put them in a cage for their own safety and to keep them out from underfoot as I rushed about trying to catch up on my delayed evening chores. But once they were all cleaned up, fluffy and dry who could resist their sweet little mews. Lol I'm a sucker.

Slowly but surely.

Today I sat down to eat my breakfast and I realized all the ingredients in my hash/ scramble except one were raised by me or my mom. And that 1 ingredient was the butter which I could have made if I had exerted a little more effort. Little by little, bit by bit.

Never underestimate...

...The power of a woman farmer wearing brand spankin' new boots. She is invincible!

...And I did what I could.

Life is usually harder than expected. Things always go wrong when you especially need then to go right. Moments of revelation when you realize that 'you' are the only answer you have to the problem. You must learn to rescue yourself, figure out the solution on your own. As a woman, I do not always have the muscle power to wrestle things into submission. This does not mean that I am incapable or inadequate or incompetent. It simply means I have to work smart, analyze and evaluate before I jump in over my head. Sometimes I need to humble myself and ask for assistance so that I do not end up gimping around for the next few weeks. Often I will have to do things differently. It may take longer but I can do it and just because it is different doesn't make it wrong. Don't limit yourself by the opinions of others. Stay focused and positive. Be strong and humble. Live with determination and faith. Believe that you can. For months every time the waterlines sprung a leak o called for assistance. Today I figured out how to fix it on my own. It was simple, boosted my confidence and the look on my boss' face when I told him was very gratifying. Last week I maneuvered a round bale on my own without popping things in my back. I had to take my time and use gravity and leverage to my favor but it was satisfying and I didn't have to OD on ibuprofen just to get out of bed the next morning. Every day and the tasks it contains are not easy. But I try to accomplish one good task each day. It helps me focus, be more motivated and often leads to more accomplishments as I don't feel overwhelmed by the daunting list. Try and try again. Blessings.

Gifts for your children.