I have so many memories of helping with the laundry as a young child. We didnt have a dryer and I used to hate it when it was one of my chores. I'd dawdle and play with the cats stretching the limits on the time I was allowed to leave my schoolwork. Grandma Spaid always had laundry hanging on her line. She only used the dryer when it was absolutely necessary. She taught me how to fold precisely, creating neat stacks in the basket right off the line. After all there was no practical sense in handling it twice and it gave you a few more moments outside. When I moved into my first house the clothes line was a definite plus, but I only used it when I had time. Spending most of my time in the barn created alot of laundry that was easier to stick in the dryer. The second house I lived in had no dryer but due to its location in the sunny south I could dry 3-4 loads of laundry in a day. When I started looking for a place near college I realized that a small yard and a clothesline were high on my priority list. So when I discovered that this place had both, I was thrilled. I couldn't wait to hang my laundry out once winter passed. It's funny how what used to be such drudgery now brings me so much joy.
Wednesday, April 5, 2017
To be honest I struggle. I struggle with being back in West Virginia. I struggle with living alone even though I am stubbornly independent. I struggle with always being the old one in my college groups. I struggle with paying my bills. I struggle with not being able to go to church because of those bills. I struggle because I know that we'll meaning people judge me even though I am doing the best I can. I struggle to keep a smile on my face. I remember being so happy, but I found out that happiness was not from being in a certain place. It stemmed from being true to my heart and the Christian values I was raised on. When I focused on me, my acheivement, my loneliness it created discontent and I would not have been happy in the best of circumstances. So in a way I am going back to my roots. I can't change alot of the situation but I can take joy from the small things. Focusing on the reason I am here and being my adventurous self regardless of what people think has made a difference. I am strong and independent, but I am also sensitive and the criticism gets to me more than you will ever see. But I smile when I remember that this is not their journey. They have made their choices I have to make mine.